There’s a fun little PC game called “Fairy Godmother Tycoon,” where you build up a potion business in a fairy-tale-like environment.  Each day there’s a news flash.  I thought the writers did a pretty good job of injecting humor into the headlines:


House that Jack built burns downs, setting off chain of tragic events

“Nine days old” pease porridge linked to E Coli breakout

Monkeys found chasing weasels around mulberry bushes – zoologists baffled

Suburban sprawl fuels gingerbread housing boom

Moon-jumping cow tests positive for bovine growth hormone

Bremen musicians top charts, prepare for solo projects

After one hour of negotiations, crisis intervention team talks mouse down from clock

News flash! Little boys made from snakes and snails, generally “icky,” conclude little girl scientists

Princess unable to sleep because of pea in mattress; dismissed as “high maintenance wench” by local handsome prince

Emperor picked up on indecency charges

Christmas pies recalled amidst plum scare

Group bathing an excellent way to conserve water, claims local butcher, baker, and candlestick maker

Rapunzel to sign endorsement deal with Vidal Saloon hair products

Do polygamist communities exist at St. Ives?  We investigate

“The Jack Sprat Diet” tops bestsellers list

Tom Thumb in fight for life after being trapped in glove

Birds of a feather not flocking together; scientists baffled

Chicken Little forecast: sky to fall tomorrow — again

Humpty Dumpty dead at age 44; all local walls required to have new “Not Safe for Eggs” warning signs

Old lady swallows fly; develops staphylococcus infection

Sleeping Beauty shocker: “I have Chronic Fatigue Syndrome”

Lack of nimbleness cited in candlestick mishap

Local dish runs away with spoon; Mrs. Dish reportedly devastated

Report: Little Piggy eats roast beef; cow retaliates by eating bacon

Government cracks down on gingerbread houses, citing obesity risk to small children

Little Boy Blue fired for sleeping on the job

Local wolf tells all in interview: “I’m not really that big or bad.  I just want to be loved”

Spider apologizes to Little Miss Muffet for emotional damage

Named in harassment suit, Georgie Porgie admits he kissed all the girls, but denies he made them cry, saying girls were “totally into it”

Farmer’s wife arrested for assault and battery; blind rodents nationwide cheer the verdict

Snow White picked to live in a house with seven dwarves in new reality television series

London Bridge unsafe, king finally admits

Local daredevil hunter catches a tiger by the toe!

Today’s lunch special at Mary’s Diner: A little lamb,  just $5.99

Pinocchio dumped by girlfriend!  “He gave me splinters!” she reveals in interview

Yankee Doodle’s Macaroni Shack closes after Feather Alfredo dish proves enormously unpopular

Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty to sue Prince Charming for bigamy; no comment from Snow White

Animal control called in to rescue French hens, turtle doves, and partridges in elaborate Christmas gift gone awry

Jack Sprat and wife banned from all-you-can-eat buffet

Old woman can’t sell shoe – is housing boom over?