Under my yearbook picture, Heyworth High School, Heyworth, IL, 1982.  Comments follow.

“I Like to Rock” — April Wine song. I was, and still am, a pretty rockin’ guitarist.

Student Council 1,4, Rep. 1,4 – Yeah, I don’t remember much about student council, except that it made me feel important for some reason.

Speech Team 2,3,4 (State 4) — Now we’re cookin’.  I was as surprised as anyone when I made state finals in original comedy in 1982. I got sixth out of seven on a pretty weak and contrived structure with a few decent jokes. The kid who won deserved it, but he was an arrogant asshole, so he also deserved a swift kick in the nuts.

Homecoming Candidate 4 – Again, a shocker.  Homecoming king candidates are popularity contest winners, and I never thought of myself as popular.

Band 1,2,3,4 – Tenor sax, baby.  I won first superior medals at every contest.  I really liked the sax, but I never had my own; I always borrowed the school’s.  I’d get one if they didn’t cost a gajillion dollars.

Chorus 2 – Don’t remember this.

Football 1,2,3,4 – I liked football.  It was easily my favorite school sport.  But I never really tried that hard.  I guess I knew that most of the other kids were more talented than me, and I focused more on the artistic stuff.  Still, hardly anybody gets cut from the team in small towns.

Varsity Club 2,4 – Don’t know what happened to 3.

National Honor Society 3,4 – I was a pretty smart mofo.

Musical 2,3,4 – The musicals were Gypsy, Guys and Dolls, and How to Succeed in Business.  In each, I’d have a small part onstage, sometimes even a song, then spend the rest of the show playing in the pit band.

Golf 3,4 – Lord, did I suck at golf.  I took it because track was too hard.  I only qualified for one meet. I think I stuck with it because the really good golfers on the team were nice, accommodating guys.

IL State Scholar 4 — Again with the smartness.

Swing Choir 1,2 – Actually, this was at Carlyle High School (IL).  I moved to Heyworth my Junior year. I know dancing around to showtune-type songs sounds a little effeminate, but I got to put my hands all over girls.

German National Honor Society 2,3,4 – Achtung, baby.

All-Conference Band 3 – Don’t remember this.

National Forensics League 3,4 – Not CSI stuff.  Speech.  Idiot.