Someone asks you: “what’s your dream job?” Do you have an immediate answer?

A few years ago, I was unemployed. At an interview at an employment agency, a young woman asked me that question.

I said, “writing for Stephen Colbert’s show.”

She smiled and said, “no, something realistic.”

I was taken aback. Mainly because if I ever asked someone that question, I would never respond with that.

If I asked you and your answer was, “feeling newly-installed fake boobs for realism,” I’d say, “you go, girl.”

I wouldn’t piss on your parade. If your answer were totally outrageous, I’d say, “that’s interesting. Do you think your skill set will help you achieve that position?”

I guess my point is: it seemed really unprofessional, and I hate unprofessionalism. My answer (laughing a bit):

“How is that not realistic?”

She just looked confused, then angrily scribbled on her questionnaire thing. I was never in touch with that agency again.


Oh, and my answer now? Colbert would still be great, but I’d really like to write for The Onion. (You guys are based in Chicago. If an Onion writer reads this, call me. XOXOXO)